What to Expect
Welcome back to Onsite where we tell you straight what happens on construction sites, these are the stories that never make the about section on the company website. This episode, we’re diving into the complexities of working in fully occupied buildings. If you think new construction is tough, try getting things done when you’re trying to make everyone happy including tenants, owners, board members, and property managers.
For those new here, this isn’t a podcast for the faint of heart. If you’re sensitive and believe everything should go exactly to plan, you might want to skip this one. If you’ve ever had to explain to a billionaire why their apartment is flooded, well tune in.
Episode Breakdown
A Different Beast
In new construction the players deal with the bullshit all the time, and include seasoned developers, architects, construction managers, etc. On the other hand occupied buildings bring an entirely different set of challenges. Here, the key players are supers, property managers, and condo/co-op boards people who know how to run a building but don’t necessarily know how to take one apart and put it back together. That’s where things get fun.
- The Hierarchy of Madness – From black tie board members to contractors who barely speak the same language (figuratively and literally), the communication breakdown is real.
- Greasy Super or Guardian – These are the guys who are boots on the ground running buildings, and they can range from shake down Don to helicopter parent.
- Crazy Requests & Impossible Expectations – Some of the best stories and worst experiences come from what people think construction should be vs. how it actually works.
Stories from the Field
These are a few of the stories we dig into during the episode, listen in to hear all the shenanigans.
- No Money Conundrum – Typical song and dance about a project that is supposedly out of money, withholding payment, yet somehow, the contractor is still expected to keep everything moving forward. There’s still a ton of work to be done, but management insists that progress continues without addressing the financial elephant in the room. The disconnect between budget constraints and project expectations has never been clearer.
- The “Not My Problem” Problem – A classic scenario where a contractor gets sent home for nonsense reasons by the building super, and somehow, the contractor is still expected to hit the schedule.
- Crystal Ball Predictions – In renovations, you don’t always have the full picture until demo is done. Some people get that. Others…not so much. Crystal ball may be the last resort on preparing a schedule.
- Always Ending but Never Ending – The saga of a project that went from “this should be simple”, “we have to get off the building”, to “why are we still here four years later?”
- The I Know Better Effect – When a wealthy drugged out resident decides mid-project that they have “better” ideas, logic be damned. Huge delays and costs that just fucks up everything.
- The Bronx Bodega Boss Visits 5th Ave – When a super doesn’t take shitty bodega bribes. A deep dive into the unspoken rules of hiring, workmanship critiques, and why everything somehow comes back to the service entrance.
- Creative Recruiting – The need for labor was so bad that contractors were scouting for workers in the subway.
- Disaster Dilemma – Imagine an apartment so wealthy it’s never lived in, a full staff managing an empty space, and yet, the building staff doesn’t even have a key. And then the flooded came…
- Finance Bros on City Regulations – Because telling the city to fuck off, is a tactic, but the reward is not worth the risk, no matter how much a hedge fund manager believes otherwise.
- Rent-Control vs. Ultra-Rich Tenants – The great divide is that one group clings to rent-controlled apartments, crammed with decades of accumulated belongings, living in borderline squalor. Meanwhile, their well to do neighbors can eat off the floor, display priceless art, and have lavish dinner parties, but the kicker is they may or may not what’s going on next door.
Wrap-Up
If this episode gave you flashbacks of painful experiences you may have had, you may not be alone, so leave a comment and let’s hear your story. And if you’re new to this world, consider this your warning label. See you next time for more of the chaos and comedy that is construction. Tune in Wednesday at 9:59am for the release.
Bonus Material
This is the episode background, which is not included in the podcast. The story behind the episode title comes from a moment of pure absurdity at a key moment during a job. We had a serious structural steel issue that we had to move out an owner, and needed to destroy the finishes in the apartment, and well no one was happy. The contractor, trying to be realistic, said it would take six months to do all the work and restore the apartment. This answer sent management into a rage and instant response of “Don’t piss on my leg and tell me it’s raining” you have to do better than that. That moment perfectly captured the disconnect between the construction world and the cushy expectations of those who live in these buildings.
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